BloodRayne (2006)

BloodRayne (2006)
Directed by: Uwe Boll
Written by: Guinevere Turner
Starring: Kristanna Loken, Michael Madsen, Ben Kingsley 

When BloodRayne was released it tanked at the box office barely making over 3 million dollars when its production budget alone was 25 million dollars, it received overwhelmingly negative reviews from critics and audiences alike and currently on IMDB it has 2.8 stars outta 10. I would have to say its a pretty bad movie but its saved by being entertaining, and not being dull or boring. Plus all the famous actors who make appearances in this movie is bound to keep you a little interested.

        Now as you probably know this movie is directed by Uwe Boll. Boll is probably one of the most talked about directors when it comes to bad movies. Now to be fair I don't dislike him, in fact most people know that I am the worlds biggest defender of his movie In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale, which I just think is a awesome fantasy adventure film and then his movie Rampage which most people don't even know he did is a actually a good movie that's very different from everything else hes done and is just all around well made. Unfortunately though most of his other movies especially his newer stuff is not only bad but boring which is the worst kind of bad in regards to movies.

        BloodRayne though isn't boring its a terrible movie but its at least never dull. Its for one a very gory movie and it has a lot of actors that I like in it. Other than that its got a lot of bad wigs, the most tacky looking swords i`ve ever seen in a nonSyFy movie, and this one subplot that was derivative from the main plot and just didn't really add anything for the movie either.

      BloodRayne in case you didn't know is based on a video game by the same name (like most of Bolls films) and tells the story of a half human half vampire (known as a Dhampir) who joins up with a group of vampire hunters to kill Kagen (Ben Kinglsley) king of the vampires. Other than that there isn't much to add on to the story, just lots of fighting and blood. If you want to hear some random trivia this movie was written by the same woman who wrote American Psycho I find that interesting because that movie is just so different from this movie.

     Now as for the acting, its sorta all over the place. Id have to say my favorite performances came from Billy Zane even though he has like only three scenes and Ben Kingsley who plays a pretty intimidating vampire/bad guy, but when this came out apparently some critics said his performance was so bad in this movie he should return his Oscar he won for Ghandi, I don't think that's fair to say cause its not a bad performance and even if he did some amazing acting its not like it would have helped elevate the films quality much . Kristanna Loken plays Rayne and her performance is well I don't know its not "bad" but its a little too unfocused to be taken seriously but she looks great in the costume so I guess that's what really mattered in the end. Than Boll regular Will Sanderson plays a really psycho henchmen to Kagen, Udo Kier plays a regal monk, Geraldine Chaplin plays a fortune teller, Meat Loaf plays a slob vampire, and of course Michael Madsen plays Vladimir the lead vampire hunter.

    Overall I cannot pretend I liked BloodRayne, and there is no way i`m gonna watch the direct to video sequels; BloodRayne 2: Deliverance which is about Rayne fighting vampire cowboys and BloodRayne: The Third Reich that's about Rayne fighting vampire Nazis, both of which have been directed by Boll. But this is one is only campy bad and I bet if you got together with some friends to watch this it'd be a good way of getting some laughs.

The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1974)

                                                                                   

The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1974)
Director: Alan Gibson
Writer: Don Houghton
Starring: Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee, Michael Coles

            The Satanic Rites of Dracula was as you probably known already know the last Hammer Dracula picture to have Christopher Lee play as Dracula, its also sadly the last Hammer production to have Cushing and Lee in the same movie together. The end result though of this movie is kinda a mixed bag and its going to come down to personal taste as to whether or not you like this movie. If you want to know what I think, I hold to belief that this movies awesome.  I love it, its a crazy 70s horror movie with an odd mixture of horror, sci-fi, and espionage all with excessive amounts of gore. Plus if you ask me its better than the last Dracula movie from the series Dracula A.D 1972.
         
           This movie has Dracula at one of his most evil. In this movie he literally wants to exterminate the human race.You may wonder why would he kill his whole food source? Van Helsing theorizes that because Dracula is a cursed immortal he wants to end his existence in the only way he sees possible by exterminating the human race, create the Armageddon. Dracula plans to do this by creating a incurable and 100x more contagious version of the black   plague. To make matters worse he has all these top minds from England professors, scientists, etc involved with the creation of the plague and participating in the "satanic rites". Leaving it up to Van Helsing (played once again played by the great Peter Cushing), Van Helsings granddaughter, and a couple Scotland yard detectives to stop Dracula before all hope is lost.
         
          Peter Cushing is awesome as always in the role of Van Helsing. While Christopher Lee plays Dracula one last time for Hammer and even though he was really tired of the role hes none the less great as usual,with that dark presence present on screen ever time hes there. Also if you've seen The Elephant Man by David Lynch you might recognize Freddie Jones who plays a scientist in league with Dracula.
         
         Overall I think this is a pretty cool Dracula movie and better than what most people give it credit for. Its dark and sports some great performances from Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee. Though it gives some odd ways of killing vampires, its in this movie I learned that silver bullets kill them, as well as Hawthorne bushes? Van Helsing explains that its because it was a Hawthorne bush that they put on Christ when he was crucified it can kill Dracula to, oh and there's another scene were Dracula accidentally touches a Bible and it burns his hand. So there is no shortage of ways to kill Dracula. Anyways this film has fallen into the public domain and is thus easily attainable if your interested in giving this movie a try.

The Lords of Salem (2013)

                                                      

The Lords of Salem (2013)
Written and Directed by Rob Zombie
Starring: Sherri Moon Zombie, Bruce Davison, Jeff Daniel Philips 

      Rob Zombies latest film is a well done, original, and utterly artistic and classy horror film. Now that being said it almost goes with out saying that this movie is definitely not for everyone. Its a very unusual movie and kinda disturbing at times, though it is not at all violent. I really don't feel though that the general public would appreciate let alone understand this movie, its a more of a film that people who a have great appreciate of horror and or Rob Zombie (which I have both) will understand and most likely really enjoy.

     One thing that I particularly liked about this movie was it evoked styles of film making that evoked the same kinda feeling I felt while watching Stanley Kubrick`s The Shining and Roman Polanski`s Rosemary's Baby, or pretty much any film by Ken Russell for that matter. Plus another thing I love about Rob Zombies films is he like Quinton Tarantino and Joe Dante have mastered this art of referencing older films within their films. Its hard to explain, but its as if they have constructed and utilized their own movie "geekyness" into their own personal films for other film geeks like me for example to pick up on and enjoy.

      Anyways The Lord of Salem is truthfully a very unique horror movie.What its about though is this radio D.J named Heidi whose sent this record that only says " a gift from the lords". When she listens to it the sound triggers disturbing flashbacks of Salem's dark past. Causing you to wonder is Heidi going mad, or are the Lords back to take revenge on Salem.

      Then as usual Rob Zombie has assembled a great cast of actors. His wife takes the lead role as Heidi and what can I say the role was literally made for her. Jeff Daniel Philips and Ken Foree play her fellow disc jockey co-workers, and Bruce Davison is especially good in his role as Francis Matthias a scholar whose a expert on the Salem witch hunts who is trying to help Heidi but unaware of the shear size of the situation shes in. As usual for a Zombie movie the movie filled with cult actors in supporting roles like Judy Gleeson (who plays Heidi's sinister landlord), Patricia Quinn, Dee Wallace, Meg Foster, Andrew Prine, and then Michael Berryman and Sid Haig play witch hunter brothers! Unfortunately though most of their scenes ended up being cut. Udo Keir and Clint Howard also had roles in this movie but sadly ended up being cut completely from the film.

     Altogether this is a great horror movie. Its very artistically directed by Rob Zombie and for me was just a breath of fresh air in regards of originality. The cast is fantastic and when I found out that this movie was 100% practical effects meaning no CGI, it just made me appreciate the movie even more. Also i`m lucky I was able to see it in the theater because I know it didn't go to 3,000 + theaters like Iron Man 3 but instead went to only I believe 400 or so theaters which is unfortunate, but lucky for me my local Harkins was showing it so I made a point of going opening weekend, but I understand a lot of other people didn't have that convince I did. Anyhow I am none the less looking forward to both this films Blu-Ray release (which i`m hoping has a directors cut and some great special features) and what ever film Rob Zombie puts out next; which I heard him say the podcast The Nerdest recently will be a sports film called The Broad Street Bullies which is about the hockey team the Philidalphia Flyers.

Ray Harryhausen (1920-2013)

                                                 

"What we do now digitally with computers, Ray did digitally long before. But without computers; only with his digits."
-Terry Gilliam

Today I got the sad news that special effects legend and icon Ray Harryhausen has died, he was 92 years old. I know I am one of countless amounts of people who have been fascinated and inspired by his work. 

Filmmakers such as George Lucas, Joe Dante, Jon Favreau, Tim Burton, John Landis, Guillermo Del Toro, Terry Gilliam and many others have been inspired by Harryhausen and all of them have at some point paid tribute to him in at least one of there movies. 

For me personally Ray Harryhausen is who got me interested in watching movies for the special effects.  As opposed to watching a movie just for the story, an actor, or a director. Like do I watch "It Came from Beneath the Sea" to see Kenneth Tobey or Faith Domergue? Or  watch "The Valley of Gwangi" because its directed by Jim O`Connolly? The answers heck no I watch "It Came From Beneath the Sea" to see Harryhausen`s amazing giant octopus destroy San Francisco and I watch "The Valley of Gwangi" to see his stop motion dinosaurs fight cowboys. 

Overall Ray Harryhausen has one the best imaginations of all time and is next to Willis O`Brian is one of the greatest stop motion artists ever. And for me there are not too many better ways to spend a cold rainy day were you cant go outside than by sitting back with a hot drink and watching one of his movies like Jason and the Argonauts and The Beast From 20,000 Fathoms. 

Rest In Peace Ray Harryhausen you will be missed

Here are some Posters to his movies: 

House of Wax turns 60

Above is the review of one of my favorite Vincent Price films House of Wax, the review was written by esteemed Film Critic Bosely Crowther.

Heat (1986)

                                         

Director: Dick Richards 
Starring: Burt Reynolds, Karen Young, Peter MacNicol 

No, this film is in no way shape or form related to the beloved Al Pacino/ Robert De Niro 1995 crime classic Heat. instead this is a laughably bad run of the mill action movie, but with its healthy dosage of Burt Reynolds action sequences and some cheesy over seriousness from the supporting actors keeps this movie  still entertaining and bad in that good sorta way.

    The two reasons why I bothered to go out of my way to watch this obscure little action movie were one; im a huge Burt Reynolds fan and to me any movie with him cant be too bad, and as of last year a remake of this movie has gone into development with Jason Statham in the lead role and as producer(!). With having seen this film now I have to say out of all the movies to remake this is a perfect one to remake.
          Now hear me out usually people freak out about remakes and its because people will do a lame unnecessary remake of a film that nobody wants to be remade nor even needs to be remade like the recent stale remake of Total Recall and the terrible 2001 Planet of the Apes remake. No this movie has so much potential and great concepts it just fails to execute them properly.

     The problems that this movie suffers from really that I haven't mentioned already are a lot of the  dialogue and drama in the movie falls flat. Then they try to rush in to many substory`s that don`t work very well because they're rushed. Like there is the whole thing involving Reynolds characters gambling problem, him sticking up for this girl who gets kicked around and beaten by "powerful" people, and then him training a kinda wimpy guy to be a bad ass like him. All of these little plots could have intertwined perfectly but it just felt too rushed and just doesn't work as good as it could have.

     Other then that I don't have much else to say about the movie. Burt Reynolds is great as always as the lead and they're some very satisfying scenes were he kicks the crap out of Las Vegas mobsters. I cant really recomend this movie to anyone unless they are actually curious to watch it or are Burt Reynolds fans like me. I am though very excited about the upcoming remake of this film with Jason Statham in the starring role and is being directed by Simon West, who recently directed the fantastic The Expendables 2 and the 2011 remake of The Mechanic (also starring Jasen Statham) which I liked better then the originally 70s version. So  it could hardly be remade by anybody better, but as for the original only watch it if your genuinely curious.

White Zombie (1932)

White Zombie (1932)
Director: Victor Halperin
Staring: Bela Lugosi, Madge Bellamy, Robert Frazer


          Despite a significant spike recently in the zombie genre the quintessential grandfather of all zombie movies "White Zombie" remains seemingly unrecognized and underrated. "White Zombie" is the first zombie movie and along with George Romero`s "Night of the Living Dead" one of my favorites. It has a haunting atmosphere, disturbing allusions to such things as necrophilia, and has Bela Lugosi in one of the best roles of his career.

      I am aware though of the argument over "White Zombies" actual quality; you have people like myself who find it to be a absolute classic and phenomenal early 30`s film. Then on the other hand you have people who don`t see the value in it and think its a dull and slow movie. I can see they`re argument but I completely disagree. I think those people come from the more modern mindset were zombies are nonstop action and filled with vicious zombies who eat the living alive. No, this is the classic sense of zombies were its all voodoo and the zombies are controlled through the voodoo  priest. So don`t worry the zombies still kill people just not by eating them.

     The films plot is about a young man obsessed with a girl so badly that he goes to a voodoo priest Murder Legende (Bela Lugosi) to lure the girl away from her fiance and make her fall in love with him, but instead basically turns her into a soulless zombie slave. Bela Lugosi`s character the wicked voodoo priest Murder Legendre is really what makes this movie so great. He looks intensely evil and can just feel the eerie atmosphere radiating off him ever time he`s on screen. For me its his hands down best performance after Dracula.

    There is one interesting rumor about this movie were evidently director Victor Halperin stepped down from the movie for some reason and Lugosi actually stepped up into the directors chair and finished directing the movie for him. I haven't had that information verified and even if its true it doesn't answer the question why Lugosi never directed again? Since this movie was really good as well as a huge box office success.

     Altogether "White Zombie" is a really creepy, atmospheric, and artistically done horror film. The sets are fantastic, especially considering this was an independent film at the time and didn't have the massive studio bucks to fiance itself. Plus with  Bela Lugosi in one of his greatest roles you have nothing to lose with watching this movie. Yet I still feel that this movie is underrated, but it has had a noticeable cultural impact the most obvious being Rob Zombie named his first band "White Zombie" specifically after this movie. Then there's the great tribute made to this movie in Tim Burton`s "Ed Wood". Finally of course there's my theory that Ra`s Al Ghul from the Batman comics was inspired by or at least partially inspired by Lugosi`s character Murder Legendre. For awhile there was talk of Tobe Hooper remaking this movie but it all fell apart back in like 2006 and there haven't been any plans or talk of trying again since, meaning more then likely well not see a remake for a  very long time if ever. Anyways "White Zombie" is a great zombie film that I would highly  recommend to anyone.